It is springbreak here in Arkansas.  I am enjoying it KID FREE!!  My oldest has gone to his great-grandmothers and the two younger ones are with my mother at my sisters house.  I miss my kiddos terrible, however, I am enjoying the peace and quiet with the hubby.  The reason for this post is a couple of things: how parenting styles differ and how do you parent.

I am not going to lie and say my kids are the best ever.  They have their faults.  Jake is super smart and he knows it.  He goes out of his way to make Ireland feel ignorant and inferior.  He also stands 6’2 so he bullies the younger two as well.  But he is funny.  When he decides to talk to us and spend time with us, he is so funny.  We have to make him have family time, even sitting at dinner with us is a chore for him.  I am hoping this to shall pass.  Ireland is super sweet when she wants to be.  But man that attitude.  She can be just as mean and ugly.  TK, well, he is a product of his raising for sure.  Super spoiled.  He is so much younger than the other two that everyone has doted on him, including me.  But how sweet he is when he gives you a super tight squeeze and tells you that you are the best mom ever.

I am too easy on my kids.  I am not going to deny it.  I came from a very rough upbringing and tend to be to easy on my kids.  I do expect them to be respectful.  That is a given.  I do let them speak their mind, just because they are kids doesn’t mean they don’t have an opinion, but they have to be respectful about it.  I probably allow them to say things that I shouldn’t.  I do not allow them to put their hands on each other and say ugly mean things to one another.  I do not believe that play fighting with guns, fists, swords is healthy.  My brother dislocated my shoulder once when we were younger fighting like this.  That’s not healthy.  I don’t allow them to use my furniture as a jungle gym.  My husband works hard for the things that we have.  Be respectful to other people’s things.  I expect them to pitch in around the house. They make the mess too. I don’t expect them to eat food they don’t like. We have a rule that you have to try a bite of it before you say I don’t like it.  Jake hates white chili, but every time I make it, he has to take a bite. Tastes change.  Some parents make their children eat it regardless.  One time when I was younger I had to do that and wound up getting sick all over the table. To this day I refuse to eat corn from a can, I know it’s all in my head.  But it was a traumatic event!!

My point is, because I realize I ramble, I am not delusional, I am not the best disciplinarian, I am not the best parent.  I love my kids. I want them to do well. I want them to be good productive adults.  I want them to look back on their childhood and have fond memories, not bad ones.  But where is the happy medium for me to be a good disciplinarian and a good loving mother?  Where do I draw that line?  Why is it so hard for me to give them consequences? I don’t want to be the cause of my kids sadness, but I feel I am doing them no favors.  How do you deal with discipline in your household? How do you stay consistent?  I need all the help I can get I think.  My hubby tells me all the time I am too easy on them.  I spoil them.  I know I do. So what do I do now?  And how can I not love these faces??

2012-08-18 15.32.26